My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Michigan and Tennessee
I have a court date on Monday for modification of visitation which I explained in another thread. I requested joint legal custody and much more visitation than was previously given to me because we used to be 800 miles apart and now we are only 300. Anyways, I just got the mothers answer to my motion and in her answer she attached a letter to the judge. In this letter she begins by stating that I do not deserve joint legal custody. her reasons are basically this : she says im belligerent and arrogant. I call my daughter on the wrong days and only talk for 5 minutes at a time ( shes 4) and there were times I would go a week or 2 without speaking to my daughter ( she just really started talking last year she was a late bloomer so it wasn't easy and also everytime I call her mother gets upset and I don't want my daughter to see this everytime we talk so I would giver her some time that she doesn't have to deal with me . I would be told very often that she was too tired or having to bad a day to deal with me) She stated in this letter that our daughter is " what some people would call a drama queen and needs constant reassurance from her mother" ( her words). Her other beef is that its a "waste of time" to drive 2 1/2 hours for our child to spend holidays with me. ( she only wants me to have 1 weekend a month . period. no holidays and only 1 week in june and 1 week in july) she says that with our work schedules neither of us can get the time off or have the money to drive our child back and forth for the amount of visitation I want ( 1 weekend a month, alternating holidays on the odd and even year and 2 months in summer and half xmas break). she says that she knows our daughter better than anyone and she believes our daughter wont be able to handle much time apart from her. I requested in my motion that I be given 48 hours advance notice of any school activities I could attend like plays and concerts and stuff, she writes in her letter that this is unreasonable and she doest think I can afford to drive 5 hours to "just see a school play" she goes onto to talk about a child I had when I was 15, and how I am a terrible father to that child who she texts on a weekly basis, my oldest daughter was adopted by her grandparents and moved across the country when I was 16. her mother is not in her life at all. In this letter she quotes Wikipedia's post about the uniform custody act, and explains to the judge how Tennessee and Michigan differ in that apparently Tennessee doesn't have legal and physical custody. one parent gets all the other parent only gets visitation. she says that she will change her custody to Tennessee in December and she asked me to wait til then to address visitation but I didn't listen to her and filed a motion anyways. So the only 1 good thing she DID state early on in the letter is that she believes I would take good care of my daughter if she was in my care. but mostly the letter is explaining how terrible I am. No metion of abuse, or neglect or anything substantial. so what do you guys think? A person close to me says he believes the judge will disregard this letter or even it may be held against her. what do you guys think?? I will assure the judge that I can afford every bit of visitation I asked for and yes I can work around my schedule for every sinlge holiday and weekend I asked for. In my motion I didn't address the mother at all except to say that I believe her and my child have a good relationship. do you think they will deny me joint legal because she says " I shouldn't have to take him into account if I want to enroll her in sports, or take her out of state"
I have a court date on Monday for modification of visitation which I explained in another thread. I requested joint legal custody and much more visitation than was previously given to me because we used to be 800 miles apart and now we are only 300. Anyways, I just got the mothers answer to my motion and in her answer she attached a letter to the judge. In this letter she begins by stating that I do not deserve joint legal custody. her reasons are basically this : she says im belligerent and arrogant. I call my daughter on the wrong days and only talk for 5 minutes at a time ( shes 4) and there were times I would go a week or 2 without speaking to my daughter ( she just really started talking last year she was a late bloomer so it wasn't easy and also everytime I call her mother gets upset and I don't want my daughter to see this everytime we talk so I would giver her some time that she doesn't have to deal with me . I would be told very often that she was too tired or having to bad a day to deal with me) She stated in this letter that our daughter is " what some people would call a drama queen and needs constant reassurance from her mother" ( her words). Her other beef is that its a "waste of time" to drive 2 1/2 hours for our child to spend holidays with me. ( she only wants me to have 1 weekend a month . period. no holidays and only 1 week in june and 1 week in july) she says that with our work schedules neither of us can get the time off or have the money to drive our child back and forth for the amount of visitation I want ( 1 weekend a month, alternating holidays on the odd and even year and 2 months in summer and half xmas break). she says that she knows our daughter better than anyone and she believes our daughter wont be able to handle much time apart from her. I requested in my motion that I be given 48 hours advance notice of any school activities I could attend like plays and concerts and stuff, she writes in her letter that this is unreasonable and she doest think I can afford to drive 5 hours to "just see a school play" she goes onto to talk about a child I had when I was 15, and how I am a terrible father to that child who she texts on a weekly basis, my oldest daughter was adopted by her grandparents and moved across the country when I was 16. her mother is not in her life at all. In this letter she quotes Wikipedia's post about the uniform custody act, and explains to the judge how Tennessee and Michigan differ in that apparently Tennessee doesn't have legal and physical custody. one parent gets all the other parent only gets visitation. she says that she will change her custody to Tennessee in December and she asked me to wait til then to address visitation but I didn't listen to her and filed a motion anyways. So the only 1 good thing she DID state early on in the letter is that she believes I would take good care of my daughter if she was in my care. but mostly the letter is explaining how terrible I am. No metion of abuse, or neglect or anything substantial. so what do you guys think? A person close to me says he believes the judge will disregard this letter or even it may be held against her. what do you guys think?? I will assure the judge that I can afford every bit of visitation I asked for and yes I can work around my schedule for every sinlge holiday and weekend I asked for. In my motion I didn't address the mother at all except to say that I believe her and my child have a good relationship. do you think they will deny me joint legal because she says " I shouldn't have to take him into account if I want to enroll her in sports, or take her out of state"
Modification of Custody: Mothers Letter to the Judge
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