My question involves juvenile law in the State of: Washington
My daughter, who is 17, had her son when she was 15. Both have lived with me solely, and I have been my grandsons sole provider (the father is not in the picture). Since his birth, she has maintained going to school while I cared for him during the day. She has also relied on me to bring him to appointments, watch him while she goes to friends, watch him while she does homework, or watch him whenever she needs a break. In short, my grandson and I spend quite a bit of time together, and he has bonded to me to the extreme.
Recently, she decided she was going to move in with her boyfriend, without my consent. His parents are aware Tha I have not consented to her actions, but do not see any problem with them allowing her a "kind, loving family atmosphere" as they have put it.
This is the second time she has done this since June. The first time I asked for CPS involvement. We agreed to counseling, which seemed to be going good. Without warning, she left, has taken my grandson with her, and has since not allowed me to see him. When I have been able to get her to respond to my contact, her reasoning has been anywhere from "I don't know" to "I don't like it here" to "you're a lazy parent who does nothing but bitch at me" to "I want to be able to get a job and support myself so you don't have to" to "get a job and stop living off the state" (I lost my job 3 months ago and am collecting unemployment).
My issues with her reasoning:
1. "I don't know" is not a valid answer
2. The lazy parent comment... When she is home, she refuses to do any chores. Will not clean up after herself. Will not clean up after her son. She leaves dirty dishes everywhere, especially the back of the couch. Dirty diapers on the floor. Food left in the high chair and all over the floor. Her room, and her son's room, are total messes with loads of laundry to be done. Basically, when she is home, the house is a pig sty.
3. She can still get a job and support herself while living at my house
4. Yes I am unemployed. Unemployment Compensation is not "living off the state". She doesn't grasp that it's a fund my employer and myself paid into in the event I became unemployed.
I have made it very clear to her that I want her home. She has stated if I force her to come home, she will leave my grandson at her boyfriends house. Personally, this seems like abandonement. It is also not a mature action, as she's using her son as a tool to hurt me.
I would like to know what my options are. Last time, the police told me they would not go get her. They wouldn't become involved unless there was a confrontation at the house she was staying when I attempt to retrieve her. Can I press charges against her? His parents? Does this qualify as harboring a minor? I feel that she's being coerced, also... can that be a factor with charges? And is there anything I can do if she is forced to come home but leaves her child at her boyfriends?
Thank you for any response.
My daughter, who is 17, had her son when she was 15. Both have lived with me solely, and I have been my grandsons sole provider (the father is not in the picture). Since his birth, she has maintained going to school while I cared for him during the day. She has also relied on me to bring him to appointments, watch him while she goes to friends, watch him while she does homework, or watch him whenever she needs a break. In short, my grandson and I spend quite a bit of time together, and he has bonded to me to the extreme.
Recently, she decided she was going to move in with her boyfriend, without my consent. His parents are aware Tha I have not consented to her actions, but do not see any problem with them allowing her a "kind, loving family atmosphere" as they have put it.
This is the second time she has done this since June. The first time I asked for CPS involvement. We agreed to counseling, which seemed to be going good. Without warning, she left, has taken my grandson with her, and has since not allowed me to see him. When I have been able to get her to respond to my contact, her reasoning has been anywhere from "I don't know" to "I don't like it here" to "you're a lazy parent who does nothing but bitch at me" to "I want to be able to get a job and support myself so you don't have to" to "get a job and stop living off the state" (I lost my job 3 months ago and am collecting unemployment).
My issues with her reasoning:
1. "I don't know" is not a valid answer
2. The lazy parent comment... When she is home, she refuses to do any chores. Will not clean up after herself. Will not clean up after her son. She leaves dirty dishes everywhere, especially the back of the couch. Dirty diapers on the floor. Food left in the high chair and all over the floor. Her room, and her son's room, are total messes with loads of laundry to be done. Basically, when she is home, the house is a pig sty.
3. She can still get a job and support herself while living at my house
4. Yes I am unemployed. Unemployment Compensation is not "living off the state". She doesn't grasp that it's a fund my employer and myself paid into in the event I became unemployed.
I have made it very clear to her that I want her home. She has stated if I force her to come home, she will leave my grandson at her boyfriends house. Personally, this seems like abandonement. It is also not a mature action, as she's using her son as a tool to hurt me.
I would like to know what my options are. Last time, the police told me they would not go get her. They wouldn't become involved unless there was a confrontation at the house she was staying when I attempt to retrieve her. Can I press charges against her? His parents? Does this qualify as harboring a minor? I feel that she's being coerced, also... can that be a factor with charges? And is there anything I can do if she is forced to come home but leaves her child at her boyfriends?
Thank you for any response.
Runaways: What Actions Can I Take Towards My 17 Year Old Runaway and the People She is Living
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